hot yellow fellows

The more Korean you know, the easier your life will become and the more Koreans you’ll meet — but it’s definitely pretty easy to get by without knowing any Korean and even easier to get by knowing just a little bit of Korean. Of course, I say this as someone living in Seoul. Your mileage may vary if you’re in a rural area.

And I can’t promise for certain that you’ll hook up with guys here, but I can say that every gay American guy I’ve known in Seoul has done very, very well in terms of casual or FWB situations. One guy I knew has been in several serious relationships as well. He met two of them through websites or apps (Gay.com and Grindr) and another at a club on Homo Hill.

If it’s just one-night stands or hook-ups you’re looking for, there’s tons of smart phone apps and there are also a few jimjilbangs that are notorious for being areas where gay men go to just hook up with one another. (But my one American friend said that at the one with the hottest guys, none were interested in involving him, though they were into him watching.) There’s apparently special etiquette, like having a towel covering your junk means you’re not interested in doing anything other than watching.

Being out of the closet is where it gets tricky, however. My friend has never been in a serious relationship with a guy who’s been completely out of the closet. His boyfriends have all been out with at least some of their friends, and one was out with his siblings. But none have been out with their parents. He’s always been introduced as a friend. If it’s public affection you’re worried about, there are certain things that can be totally passed off as just friendly, so even if a guy is closeted, he’ll still be at least holding your hand or leaning on you, especially if alcohol is involved. And at Homo Hill or Jongro, things are waaaaaay more relaxed in terms of PDA.

I’m pretty sure this is also you, so I’ll add it here:

“The Oppa factor lol. Do guys like it if other guys call them Oppa if they are dating?”

My friend always dated down in age, haha, so I can’t answer for sure. I’m going to tentatively say yes, though.

Anyone else have anything to add or corrections to make?

Ask me anything

imnopicasso said: You know if you dump water into the bowl, it will flush….

I know nothing practical in the world. This is a miracle fix.

talkinboutstuffseoul said: Imagine the same circumstance, but with a completely fluent, native speaking head teacher. He makes me want to scream.

Yes! She’s fluent, too! It makes it extra irritating because she’s the nicest and most responsible of all of the handlers I’ve ever had, the best at English, and she’s the least efficient at doing her job!

Today I came in and asked when, and she just exasperatedly said, “Soon!”

I asked her when she’d last called the landlady, and she said that she hadn’t spoken to her since yesterday.

And then I (very unprofessionally and very embarrassingly) flipped my shit and told her that I have to pee in my sink (don’t judge; I have no toilet and can’t always be at coffee shops when nature calls) and that we’re coming up on a long weekend and I find it hard to believe that no one has given an estimation of how long it’ll be and that this is her job.

And then we had a more civilized conversation and both of us apologized. I explained my frustrations that she’s dropped the ball in the past and that I feel like everyone’s forgetting it’s a long weekend. I also told her that I feel like neither she nor my landlady understand that I don’t have anywhere to use the bathroom right now. Apparently the plumber has another job to do, but he got the serial number of the toilet and needs to look up if it’s in stock — but I still don’t understand why he can’t easily give an estimation of when this will be fixed or why he hasn’t called yet with that information. Or, better yet, why we can’t just call another plumber.

After our conversation, I was feeling much better about the situation overall, although still slightly embarrassed by what I’d said. I had a great last day of camp, what with a pizza party and then some major bonding with my second graders, but once I got back to my office, my co-teacher was gone. No note. Nothing. She hasn’t contacted me either. So I still have no fucking idea when this fucking toilet will be fucking fixed. It’s looking like it’s going to be on Wednesday, if I’m lucky.

Not happy. Not feeling better.

Looks like I’ll be making a trip to the plumbing market tomorrow with Bacon and fixing this stupid thing myself.

My handler co is an excellent co-teacher. She is. And she’s a very sweet person.

But she sucks at the handler part of her job. When my school owed me 200,000 for apartment expenses, she forgot about it for a month. Whenever I’ve asked her questions about random things — skin clinics in the area, buses to school, if she could call a cab for me, etc. — she’s said she’ll answer those questions. And then forgets.

Yesterday, I broke my toilet while cleaning. So I texted her that exactly. She reads it, and half an hour later, her reply is, “LOL! That’s funny! You should call your landlady!”

I completely fail to see the humor in this situation.

Okay, I said, but it will be very, very difficult for me because I don’t speak Korean and she doesn’t speak English.

An hour later, she calls the landlady.

I need a new toilet tank. I tried to explain this by demonstration, but the landlady didn’t understand and called in a plumber who was totally unprepared for the repair. He came in this morning, with the landlady, and neither person said a word to me and just complained about my shoes in the doorway.

I get to school and ask my co about this. She says that the landlady is looking into the problem and will call a plumber. She’ll pay for the repair — and then I have to pay her back. But she’ll just go ahead and get the repair. Without me agreeing to the cost.

When I explain that I’m not totally comfortable with that, she calls the landlady back and says they’ll relay prices back and forth. Then, at the end of the day, I ask her if she knows when the next plumber will come.

“Soon.”

I ask her if she knows when.

“Oh, I don’t know. Just soon.”

Okay, I said, I hope it’s really soon because not having a toilet is really, really inconvenient.

She just smiles and says, “Okay, see you tomorrow!”

There’s been no word from her since.

We’re coming up on a long weekend. I highly doubt any plumbers will be around from Sunday until Wednesday. That leaves Friday and Saturday for a plumber visit.

I just wish I could take away my co-teacher’s toilet access, because I don’t think she understands that I have nowhere in my apartment or apartment building to use the restroom. It’s a dire situation, and it’s one that’s bound to get worse after tomorrow. Unless Bacon and I can DIY this mofo.